I'd be Better Off Dead

I'm not sure what's gotten into me. But last night, I quoted "Better Off Dead" the Movie, which really isn't something new or rare for that matter. I'd say I quote this movie at least once a week, if not more often.

If you have not had been fortunate enough to watch this totally 80's movie, well then my friend you have been truly deprived!
(image found http://www.videospot.co.za/scripts/upload/img/BetterOffDead.jpg)
The premise: Lane Myer(John Cusack) is madly in Love with Beth, who dumps him for somebody; "Smarter, Better looking, Drives a nicer car" And Lane thinks he'd be "Better Off Dead" He then meets a French foreign exchange student who sadly has to live with Ricky (who is very socially awkward) and his Mom. And their stories intertwine into a beautiful love story. Hehehe.

Oh I almost forgot, Lane's Mom truly helps with the comedy in this movie,
Jenny Myer: [regarding the blob of food] It's got raisins in it... you like raisins.
And my All time Favorite Charles De Mar, Everything he say's in this movie makes me cry.

What's your favorite quote?

Here are some of my favorite quotes to brighten you day!

~
Monique Junot: He keeps putting his testicles all over me.(remember she's french)
Lane Myer: Excuse me?
Monique Junot: You know, like octopus? Testicles?
Lane Myer: Ohhhh. Tentacles. N-T. Big Difference.

~
Lane Myer: Sorry Johnny, I don't have a dime.
Johnny: Didn't ask for a dime. Two dollars.
Lane Myer: My little brother got his arm stuck in the microwave. So my mom had to take him to the hospital. My grandma dropped acid this morning, and she freaked out. She hijacked a busload of penguins. So it's sort of a family crisis. Bye!
[slams the door shut]

~
Charles De Mar: This is pure snow! Do you have any idea what the street value of this mountain is?

~
Charles De Mar: Greendale is a bodaciously small town, Lane. A fly speck on the map - a rest stop on the way to the ski slope. I can't even get real drugs here!
[holds up a bottle of whipped cream]

~
Charles De Mar: Suicide is never the answer, little trooper.
Charles De Mar: And dying when you're not really sick is really sick, you know. Really!


~
Charles De Mar: I've been going to this high school for seven and a half years. I'm no dummy. I know high school girls.

~
Charles De Mar: [giving skiing instructions] Go that way, really fast. If something gets in your way, turn.

~
Lane Myer: [indicating to Mrs. Smith's accident] Gee, I'm really sorry your mom blew up, Ricky, guess she won't be able to eat any spicy foods for awhile.

~
Charles De Mar: The K-12 dude. You make a gnarly run like that and girls will get sterile just looking at you.


~
Lane Myer: Two brothers... One speaks no English, the other learned English from watching "The Wide World of Sports." So you tell me... Which is better, speaking no English at all, or speaking Howard Cosell?

~
Charles De Mar: Wait, wait a minute...
[starts to snort snow off his top hat]
Charles De Mar: [sniff] Oh.
[shouts]
Charles De Mar: Oh! Ugh! Outrageous! This is pure snow! It's everywhere!
[raises right hand]
Charles De Mar: [shouts] I think I just froze the left half of my brain!
[waves arm in circles]
Charles De Mar: [shouts] Look! I can't move my right arm!
Lane Myer: This isn't funny, Charles! If I don't have a dream, I have nothing!
Charles De Mar: Ah, come on! It's Christmas Eve! I could be home right now, drinking this *monster* eggnog my brother makes with lighter fluid.

~
Lane Myer: [talking about skiing the K-12] Look Charles, I gotta do this. If I don't, I'll be nothing. I'll end up like my neighbor Ricky Smith. He just sits around crocheting all day and snorting nasal spray.
Charles De Mar: He snorts nasal spray? Know where I can score some?
Lane Myer: ARE YOU GONNA HELP ME OR NOT?

~
Roy Stalin: Alright, who wants to hold my clipboard?
[Beth raises her hand]
Roy Stalin: Well you'll make a fine little helper. What's your name?
Charles De Mar: [Thinking Roy has referenced him] Charles De Mar!
Roy Stalin: Shut up, geek.

Thank you IMDB.com for providing these bodacious quotes!